The room is quiet, though a few of the agents glance at each other -- sharing alarmed and concerned looks -- but the concern turns out to not be about the Aryan Brotherhood, it's about the obvious and continued political pandering of the word 'domestic terrorist'.
An agent in his fifties, with the gray hair and forehead lines to show his years, suddenly breaks the silence. He says, "Hold on a second -- the Aryan Brotherhood, it's the same Aryan Brotherhood from the 1990s. Drugs, prostitution, organized crime -- they're not domestic terrorists. These guys don't give a rip about politics. This is a street gang / prison gang. Yeah they have their swastikas and tattoos -- but they're not domestic terrorists. Now you want us to believe they're suddenly getting political?"
The supervisor says, "We've got one of them posting hate speech and making threats."
The agent in his fifties replies, "It's the Aryan Brotherhood. That's all they do. They talk crap all day long. About everybody... this sounds like more of that Biden-Harris Administration bull crap... Who did we entrap this time?"
The supervisor replies, "Yeah, well, the hate speech is making a lot of people uncomfortable. This is coming from the top. Things are getting woke, things are going DEI. Plus we need the funding, we need ongoing arrests for domestic terror."
"Speaking of that," the supervisor adds. "The main reason we've called this meeting today is to encourage all of you to embrace DEI and all the opportunities it's given, and the new generation of recruits that are joining our ranks... I'd like to introduce new Lead Agent Samantha Bell, who some of you know formerly as Samuel Bell and her pronouns are she / her."
Wearing a blazer and blouse, pressed slacks, and long hair past her shoulders, Samantha Bell stands up before the group.
What stands out most is her red lipstick and eye liner -- clearly the ugliest transgender surgery operational disaster any of the agents present have ever seen -- which is what more than one agent in attendance thinks quietly to themselves that morning.
Holy Jacko, they really butchered her!! She's not winning a beauty contest any time soon.
Samantha starts her speech with, "I'm sure all of you have heard about the Catholic Choir Boys. They are dangerous and very, very hateful. These are text book domestic terrorists."
Samantha pauses, looks around the room, then continues, "Children should be allowed to attend schools where they can receive education about LGBTQ and transgender freedoms but there has been push back by parents and very abusive disagreements at PTA meetings."
One agent asks aloud, "Why and how exactly are these Catholic Choir Boys dangerous? According to reports from several agents, we have found zero threats ever posted on any social media. They don't have any arrests, they don't attend political rallies, most don't own any firearms, and they don't pray outside abortion clinics. Plus they're not even going to these PTA meetings. And we're calling them domestic terrorists??"
An agent to his right stands up and says, "I agree. It's about time we get a lot more disclosure. What is it exactly that makes these young men a threat? Aren't we harassing these guys, defaming their names around their communities? At some point isn't this going to bite us in the ass? At the level the harassment's getting I would think that the federal government is going to end up getting sued, or worse."
Samantha suddenly looks irate. She shouts, "THE DEMOCRATS ARE VERY CLOSE TO PASSING LEGISLATION THAT WILL EFFECTIVELY SILENCE THE CATHOLIC CHOIR BOYS AND ANY OTHER RELIGIOUS GROUP THAT OPPOSES TRANSGENDER AND LGBTQ EDUCATION IN PUBLIC SCHOOLS. We can't back off now when we're so close!!"
Across the room another FBI agent stands up and says, "I didn't sign up for this. This is starting to look and sound a little bit crazy, a little bit outside the law."
Samantha glares at the agent. She says angrily, "The Catholic Choir Boys are the crazy ones. They're crazy. They are domestic terrorists. They don't support transgender freedoms... They ostracized me when I first started dressing as a woman my senior year of high school. Plus none of the girls in gym class wanted me anywhere near their locker room... I have seen and experienced the hate firsthand."
The agent locks his eyes with Samantha, looks past her, shakes his head. "It sounds like you have a real personal vendetta," he says. He looks around the room. "A lot of us talk privately and we want nothing to do with this vendetta. We used to have fine, well respected agents that included Catholics that have either been fired or resigned or become whistle blowers and we don't like what you're doing. Your Democrat DEI vendetta is a dark cloud over the agency."
Another agent stands up and says, "We're gonna blow a whistle on this. It is true, what we keep hearing in right wing media. You've weaponized us and now a few of us are concerned that somehow there's going to be a widespread arrest of American citizens following the coming election -- if Kamala Harris loses. We've seen the memos. How big are those lists connecting people to January 6?... Anyone that voted Trump?... What about new Trump supporters? Are they insurrectionists as well? ... This ship's about to sink -- there's no way that this works out for us."
Samantha aggressively shakes her head and waves her arms. "This is equivalent to mutiny!! Don't listen to those right wing radicals," she exclaims, eyes wide. "They need to be lined up and shot." She almost loses her balance suddenly as a high heel on one of her feet wobbles. "You and so many men here are misogynistic. But that's okay -- we have hired and trained so many women and we have many, many fine transgender recruits to replace you with. If you're lucky maybe you'll find work with the ATF... but even if you get hired on there don't expect to keep that job long because DEI is on the march and there's no stopping it."
"This is gross," the agent replies with a disgusted look. "This DEI is way out of hand... It's a scam. Domestic terrorists -- that's a scam too. Your whole program is a scam... Dan Bongino is right. Newsmax, Fox News, Jesse Watters -- they're all nailing this right on the head." Murmurs, head nodding take place around the room. A few start to stand and within moments most of the men present stand up from their seats and start walking for the doors. A few women follow.
Samantha stares on angrily as many of the agents walk out the doors. A few moments later she pulls out her cell phone and starts dialing. She smiles as the phone rings and is answered. "You and Hillary were right, Barack... It worked... We just had several hardliners get up and walk out... Please have those replacements ready to report to duty first thing tomorrow... We've got work to do... Oh, and please tell Bill... I said hi."
