Survive Any Disaster - Satire News in a World Gone Mad
Survive Any Disaster - Satire News in a World Gone Mad

Biden Admin Hires Illusionist David Copperfield -- Promises to Make Trump "Disappear" at the Debate

Biden Admin Hires Illusionist David Copperfield -- Promises to Make Trump 'Disappear' at the Debate
by Kent Wilson | Political Satire, U.S. News

FINALLY - Trump plans to devastate Biden at the debate with 3 surprise questions. Frantic, the Radical Left turns to David Copperfield. "We need Trump to disappear. He can't ask these questions."

The Biden Administration and it's Soros funded Radical Left think tank is in a scramble after discovering Trump's plans to surprise Joe Biden with 3 questions intended to trainwreck Biden's campaign for Presidency and take a large number of voters away from the Democrat party.

"Mr. Copperfield," says an advisor to President Biden. "We need you to help us pull a disappearing act. The greatest disappearing act of all time! It has to happen within the first 3 minutes of the televised debate, before Donald Trump has an opportunity to ask the following questions."

The advisor pulls out a sheet of paper, starts reading aloud.

"Question 1... What is Drag Queen story hour and why is it so important to Democrats that these transvestites dressed in drag be pushed on children in cities across the nation?

2. Why are teachers in rainbow flag liberal states like California pushing the transgender movement on public school children, and why are they advising children that they can change their gender, have their genitals removed, and be put on puberty blockers?

3. Why are toddlers being put on catwalks and being used as stage entertainment in Gay Pride parades?

Oh, and there's another note in here, our hackers read this in a text exchange from someone on Donald Trump's team. It reads:
By the way -- WHY did the Democrat party not approve these questions for the debate?? What are the Democrats afraid of?? Are you afraid that your registered voters will find out how morally corrupt the Democrat party has become?"

Biden's advisor folds up the sheet of paper. The advisor and the entire room look expectantly at David Copperfield.

Copperfield stands up. He looks around the room solemnly. "Someone needs to make you guys disappear," he says with a sigh, shaking his head.

But that George Soros money sure looks good in my offshore accounts.

"What was that?" asks an advisor.

"Nothing, never mind that," Copperfield replies.

Biden's advisor says, "Whatever happens, we cannot -- we absolutely cannot -- let Donald Trump debate us on these emotionally charged questions. It could definitely hurt us bad. As it is we are hard at work pressing to make the economy and inflation the main talking points at the debate as well as immigration, and abortion -- none of these will cost us votes. These are all safe, dry topics. We are firmly locked in with Democrats on these issues."

"I see," Copperfield replies. "That's what we in the industry call a smoke screen. Well done. You do have a very gullible audience, don't you?"

Copperfield pauses. Shakes his head. He says, "Okay, here's what we're going to do with Donald Trump... At 2:47 seconds into the debate there's going to be an electrical shortage behind the stage, a lot of sparks and smoke. A light high over the stage is going to break away and fall down in a swoop over the chair where Donald Trump is sitting, more smoke and more sparks. Suddenly the power is going to be cut out for just .08 of a second, the arena goes dark. The chair that Donald Trump is sitting in is going to drop into the floor with Donald Trump still on it, and another chair, an empty chair, is going to pop up in it's place. When the lights come back on Donald Trump will be long gone. Abracadabra... Alakazam."

President Biden jumps to his feet, eyes wide. He shouts, "Hocus pocus, mother truckers!! Hocus pocus. You're HIRED David Copperfield. You are HIRED."

David Copperfield shakes his head, then nods. "Don't thank me yet, Mr. President. There's one more thing I need you to do at the debate. We need to make sure you sit in the right chair."

"Thank you Mr. Copperfield," Biden replies. "Yes, please make sure I sit in the right chair."

Copperfield locks his gaze on Biden. For a moment, he just stares at Biden. "It's the right chair, all right."

There's a twinkle in Copperfield's eyes that in the days following the debate a close advisor to the President admits "did cause some alarm" and he "deeply regrets not speaking up at the time".

David Copperfield produces a pen and a batch of papers and hands it to Biden. "One more thing," he says. "Just need you to sign here on this waiver form. Just a standard form releasing me from any liability."

An assistant to President Biden steps forward. "Why do we need that? You know what you're doing."

Copperfield claps the assistant on the back: "It's a stage show. Sometimes things can go... not quite as expected. But, yes, I know exactly what I'm doing. Just sign and let me do what I do best... I make things disappear, and I make other things reappear."

#BidenGoesMissing   #TrumpAcesDebate

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